I LOVE...

I want to update.

2009-12-17T04:11:44Z

However, I fear that if I update in the mindset that I am in right now...
Nothing good will come of it... So I guess I will edit for emotional reasons and just tell the good parts.

Marissa came over on Tuesday after she got out of work.
It is always, always awesome to see her.
I missed her so much.
We (her, Joe and I) played LIFE and a thrilling game of Scrabble for about half an hour until we gave up.
Then we watched Inglorious Bastards.
I really, really liked the movie, aside from Brad Pitt's obnoxious accent.
And the random bouts of forehead carving.
The film is by Quentin Tarentino, So if you're not familiar with his work be prepared for gore.

Joe and I are ok.
Maybe not all the time, but i guess most of the time we are.

My car needs new tires (fuck my god damn life).
I almost got T-boned last monday going to work when my tires caused me to slide right into an intersection, causing me to come side to face with a Jeep...
I have decided that I can't drive in winter. I'm traumatized.
White knuckled, and jaw clenched I give myself migraines when the weather is slightly snowy.
I grind my teeth so much that it hurts to chew anything afterward.
This is something I need to get over.
Or, it's something I need to get away from.

Danny turned 21 today!
we can finally go out and drink legally.
He and I did a shot of Patron at the restaurant.
I forgot how much I hated Patron.
It's different to drink legally with Danny.
But all good either way.

Recently, I came to the fact that I am not really good at anything I try to do.
I decided that this was because instead of focusing my energy on craft things,
I want to devote myself to working and making money, so that I can travel.
I get depressed when I stay home for too long.
There is something about going different places that just makes me happier.
And there are so many places that I want to go to.
New Orleans, Seattle, Italy, Ireland, Germany, Japan.
I want to go everywhere.
I think traveling is what will make me the happiest.

I'm not happy, but I'm not sad, either.

2009-12-06T22:40:04Z

I am just kinda confused, wondering if this is something that is going to pass, or if it's something that won't.
And I don't know if I want it to pass. There's got to be a reason I/we feel this way.
Maybe it's the shortening of the days that has my mind on the wrong train of thought.
Winter always seems like the end to everything I enjoy.

And on a side note

2009-12-06T03:17:14Z

I just totally let this obnoxious woman have a piece of my mind.

Background:
this crazy lady came in on Thursday, and checked into 226.
Friday she came down and said she heard pipes in the middle of the night and wanted to move rooms.
Natalie moved her to a different room.

This morning, that lady called Becca to say she left her charger in her old room.
She then said she didn't remember what room she was in, but Becca could figure it out, and get the charger for her.
Becca told her she had no way of figuring out what room she was in.
The lady told her point blank that she WOULD figure it out and get her charger, and hung up.
(which was unbearably rude and she was unreasonably demanding)

Becca eventually found the charger and brought it here to the front desk, and told me about the lady.

This woman just fucking called me and told me that I was "going to put the charger in the room" so it would be there when she got home.
I told her that I couldn't leave the desk, but that I would leave the charger at the desk for her.
and she said "NO. YOU WILL PUT IT-" and I interrupted her and said "ma'am, I am not leaving the desk. I do not go up to guests rooms, and I will NOT be taking the charger to your room, I think you have been very rude to me, and to the clerk this morning. So I will leave the charger at the desk and you can pick it up in the morning" and she said "ok"

it was hilarious, and I laughed a bunch afterward.

"you're not good enough to be full time, but we feel bad about that, so...."

2009-12-06T03:06:01Z

I got turned down for the job i so desperately wanted, but Paul just called me yesterday to say he had another job opening if I was interested. It's still full time, but it's basically just doing what I was doing at the Marriott. Which was the breakfast and "sundowner" which is a light dinner sort of thing. I would not be making as much money. Or I could spring for their part time front desk position with 2 nights a week doing the night audit.
So here are the down sides to each position:

Full time sundowner attendant.
-Saturday and Sunday mornings Start work at 6am.
- Less Money*
- Working with food
- Cleaning up after people*
- Did not like doing it at Marriott.

Part Time Front Desk
- less hours
- no benefits
- no Vacation/ sick time
- I have to see the damn girl who got the full time position
- Two Night Audit shifts a week (overnight)

and the positive sides to each?
NO longer working at this hotel.

I got a raise on Monday.
After being here for 3 years, You would think maybe I'd get a decent raise.
Maybe like, $ .50 more an hour, or a dollar.
But you would be wrong.
My raise this year was 2% of my hourly rate.
I got eighteen cents.
The first year I worked here, I got a 50 cent raise.
And don't tell me it's the economy.
I just had a sweet little talk with one of my friends, and the company he has worked for for a year gave him a 23% raise.
and he makes a hell of a lot more than I do.
I'm just tired of a company that doesn't appreciate their employees.
We got $50 for a holiday party this year. That's enough to buy a pizza maybe.
The christmas before last, We went to a restaurant/bar type place and had pizza and wings and appetizers.
and drinks!
I'm just tired of seeing everyone being under appreciated for all the work we do around the hotel.
Margaret has been here 10 years. She does the overnight laundry.
Overnight positions typically pay $10 an hour minimum.
Margaret makes $9.72 an hour.
TEN YEARS

It's time this company got their act together.
Someone who really cares about this company should buy it.
Rather than having a "holding company" squeeze the money out of us before selling us to another holding company.
I just needed to get this off my chest.
These hotels have the potential to be amazing!
But they won't invest the money into them, or their employees.

I am going to start my own hotel chain.
I apparently know how to work things haha.

When will you learn?

2009-12-01T00:30:55Z

Ugh. I want to say something so bad.
But I can't, because it's none of my business,
and the backlash I can assure you that it would cause would not be worth it.
So I shall keep my mouth closed.
But I don't agree with what is going on.
I think it's time to grow up.

arg.

2009-11-27T06:36:20Z

I didn't get it. This sucks, but I can't stop trying to get out of there.
Even though it makes me afraid to look elsewhere, because I tried once already and failed.
This is the epitome of why i don't try new things... why I have been at the SAME shit job for 3 years...
I'm not gonna lie. I am kinda crushed.

Extended Stay Hotels

2009-11-22T18:42:35Z

Places their ad's all over my web pages.
I can't go anywhere without seeing an advertisement for ESH.
Anywho, my last entry was friends only.
Because my live journal is flagged by the ESA police, and I don't think they need to know any more of my personal business.
( Hi guys! :] )

really.

2009-11-11T19:14:29Z

I need to start getting out of the house more. I have done nothing since I got back, and it's been almost 2 weeks.
If i keep this up, I will end up being the most miserable girl in the world.
Honestly, I feel like all i do is work, come home, make dinner, watch tv (fall asleep on the couch) and then go to bed.
No... that actually is all i do.
Where did my life go?

"oh, shit I cut my nails!"

2009-11-10T05:25:38Z

So It's been a little over a week since I got home, and since Joe moved in.
I have been stressing out about money since I got home, because my bank charged me $120 in over draft fee's for each $1.50 they charged me for checking my balance on the ship, or ANY OTHER ATM, on top of them charging me ridiculous "international fee's" all together totaling about $30. So when it said I had about $37 in my account, I really didn't have ANY money. fuckers.
So anyway, my paycheck was lower than it was supposed to be, and then I had to pay an extra $100 in rent because we're using the apartment, and that left me with like $90, then I bought $20 in gas on Friday and went to the dollar store... so I now have about $60.
So... I have been freaking out. And I need to learn not to flip out on Joe because it's actually not his fault that I am so broke right now.
Today was pretty fun tho. We went to the Glen H. Curtiss Museum in Hammondsport, which was really awesome. They have planes, and motorcycles, and they are just now setting up a miniatures display for Christmas. There was so much stuff. They re create planes every few years and right now they are working on a plane that they are building based on photographs. They fly the planes they build too! We are going to go next September to see them fly one of the planes they re created, because we missed it this year.
On the way home, my brake lines failed. I guess it happened before we got there, cause Joe mentioned that they all of a sudden went soft, and I thought he was lying. But lo and behold he was right (as he usually is). So He drove the hour and a half back to Mendon with no brakes (he's the best). So now I'm going to have to take my car BACK into the shop and see what the damage is going to be. YAY! Brake lines shouldn't be THAT hard, or expensive. Hopefully it will be less than a hundred dollars. But the problem is that now both Joe's and my cars don't work. So we are basically car less... his is a tad more driveable than mine is, so I'm going to drive his for a day or so to work until I get mine fixed.
We have been cooking dinner every night, which has been pretty awesome. We don't have a microwave, so it's not like we are half assing anything. We've made Chili, Mac 'n' cheese, mashed potatos, Pierogis, and some other stuff that I can't think of right now. today we had broccoli, with Mashed potatos, and Chicken with Essence of Emeril! oh my god the Essence is SOOOO good. So I think it's been pretty good lately, aside from my viscious, and sometimes leathal mood swings.
OH and we're going to drink a SHIT load of Miller High Life so we can get points and then get merchandise from them!
We are totally living the high life. fer sure.

You are the blood in my veins, you are the smell before rain.

2009-11-05T02:39:44Z

I guess now would be a good time to update about the cruise. . . since I am at work and i have nothing else to do at the present moment.

I will start with the Saturday before we left.

Saturday- I worked 645 until 3, then came home and started packing. Did a whole bunch of laundry and got ready to go out with Amber and Peter to Vinyl for our birthdays. I met up with them at MacGreggors around 10pm, did a few shots, had a cocktail, then Ralph drove us to Vinyl, and we got beer and got wasted. Amber got black out drunk, and decided that 1am was a good time to leave. So since she was our ride, Peter and I had to go too, leaving Greg and John and Amber's friend Mike at the club. The other guys decided to leave too, so I waited for greg to close his tab, after telling Peter that I'd meet them at the car. As I get close to the car, I see Ralph pulling out into traffic and driving away. I got left on East Ave with Greg and John haha. So I was pissed cause I wanted to go home, so I was bitchin about how i couldn't get a ride until 7, and then I called JPal, and he said he was stopping by Zac's house so he'd give me a ride home.

Sunday- I woke up SO hung over. I puked like 4 times. (the first on purpose, the rest because I wasn't in control anymore) Amber and Foster brought me Pita Pit, so that was awesome. Then we went to pick up Caragh.
The first flight out of Rochester went well, and we landed in Georgia with 2 hours to spare (so we thought). We had dinner at a restaurant right outside our gate, and imagine our surprise when Delta announces a gate change to an entirely different terminal... like 15 min before we were supposed to be boarding. So we sprinted through the airport, ended up missing our flight (along with 12 other people). So we got a free hotel room for each of us because we had to wait for a flight out the next morning at 8.

Monday-
We caught our flight to Ft Lauderdale at 8 with no problems, and got our luggage with no problems as well. We couldn't go to the ship until 2, so we waited around in the airport for a little under 3 hours then grabbed a cab to the port.
We got on the ship around 1:30, they let us board, and we wandered around the ship for a while. At 5pm we had a mandatory Muster Drill (where we go if the ship is in trouble) and they showed us how to use the life vests.
We went back to our room and immediatly tried on the life vests and took pictures. It was sweet.
We started cruising around 6pm, so we went up on deck, grabbed a couple drinks, and marveled at how awesome it was that we were on a cruise. The drinks were really good. REALLY good.
We had our first dinner at 8:30pm, and got to meet our table mates.
We were sitting with 3 couples, and we were the youngest at the table... but it ended up being probably the best table on the cruise.
The people we met were so awesome. There was Jada and Jason who were newly weds, Lisa and Charles who weren't married, but who were really awesome, and Randy and Margaret who were really awesome too.
We hung out on deck for a while until we decided to go to bed.

Tuesday-
We docked in Key West, and got off the ship about 9:30am. We had our first excursion which was a Pub Tour in honor of it being Amber's birthday. So we started drinking at 10am. . . and we had to be back on the ship by 3. So the pub tour took us to 4 different bars, and we got a free drink at each one, all of which were pretty good. Our tour guide, Brian, was a freakin riot. He was so funny. he had a Conch (pronounced Conk) that he would blow to signal that we were going to a different bar. So on the way to the last bar, we had a conch blowing contest, and Caragh and Amber made it into the top 3 (i didn't try, otherwise I would have won... :p) Anyway, Amber won and got a sweet beaded necklace and the title of "Best Conch Blower in Key West" Amber blows good Conch. After the PUb Tour was over we went to another bar that I don't really remember the name of. Capitan Tony's maybe. Anyway we had another drink there, and played somepool then we left and played around in a sculpture garden which was awesome.
When we got back on the boat we decided to lay out in the sun. I got a hang over which was awesome, and spent the rest of the day not drinking. We went to the show they had for the night, a tribute to broadway I think it was, then we got some pictures taken of us in our formal wear and went to the formal dinner. The food on the cruise was freaking amazing, and I don't remember everything I had. But we had a wine package, so we had wine for every night at dinner. I honestly have no idea what we did after dinner.
Our waiter and assistant waiter were amazing. Sanjay and Jose, were their names and they were hilarious and just funny as heck.
OH we went to a club on the ship called the Viking Lounge after dinner and danced then came back to the room.

Wednesday-
We arrived in Cozumel at some point, and got off the ship and onto another ship to go Snorkeling. The "tour guides" served us drinks (including Margaritas and rum punch) on the hour ride to the snorkeling spot. Once in the water Amber and I were both shocked to find that there were, in fact, fish in the ocean. and they were swimming all around. This shocked me so much I actually yelled. I got over it, and we snorkeled for about an hour and a half. And We saw 2 Nurse Sharks, and a Sting Ray. Then we saw the "drop off" which was a liiitle bit scary because all of a sudden, you can't see anything below you. After Snorkeling, we went to a beach and they gave us lunch, and I layed in the sun while caragh and Amber layed on the beach and wrote things in the sand and collected shell things. then on the way back to the port, we sat on top of the boat and drank margaritas and did shots of tequila with the crew on the boat, then we did the Macarrena (which is a very popular song, apparently. Because we heard it about 4 times while we were sailing) We got back to the ship and showered and stuff, then we went to a show they had it was a Beatles Tribute Band, Revolution. And they were really good. We later met the guitarist who was playing George Harrison. His real name was Omar, and he had long Black hair and he said I seem like a girl who wants to be liked by everyone. (which is true, I mean I have to give the kid credit) So We went to a dancing under the stars party on the main deck of the ship, and Amber and I danced to one song, then she abandoned me and I had to learn the next song all by myself while this guy was all up in my face (and everyone else's) with a video camera. Anyway, I got kinda drunk that night wich was cool.

Thursday-
We got to Belize at 7am, and our excursion left at 8 i think? We went Cave Tubing which was pretty fun. It was relaxing, and the caves were pretty neat. Caragh saw a snake, but I did not. After tubing, we went for lunch at a pretty neat restaurant with a nice buffett. They had fried Plantains which were amazing. The ride to the caves was about an hour, and we all pretty much passed out on the bus ride back to the ship. I didn't realize that Belize was such a 3rd World Country tho. They had a lot of slummy looking places. We went shopping when we got back to the port, and then we took a tender back to the ship because the water was too shallow for the cruise ship to dock in a port. I am tired and I am having trouble remembering what we did Thursday through Saturday... So I will update more tomorrow!

Hi.

2009-11-03T22:35:33Z

The cruise was awesome.
I want to go again with more people, so we can all share the awesomeness.
I will update about that later I think because I need to think of all the stuff we did.

Joe moved in the day I got home.
Which has been sweet, aside from the fact that we really don't have anything to cook with.
Anywho... it's cool.

Here's the thing...

2009-10-25T17:56:42Z

You can love someone, imperfections and all.
But where is the line between loving someone's imperfections, and loving someone's character flaws?
I think there needs to be a line somewhere between the two.

I'd rather be here, than anywhere with you.

2009-10-25T01:22:47Z

So... I have not actually "updated" in a while. I will list some of the important things that happened recently.
(at least as much stuff I can remember)
-I turned 24 on the 15th. A bunch of people came out to Bug Jar.
    - I finally got to see Marissa, which was awesome!
    - Danny was drunker than I was on my birthday, which was funny.
    - Joe is the best ever because he drove me home from the bar while I was drunk.
    - ^ and I love him.
    - I'm pretty sure I did a whole bunch of shots, which I don't remember doing.
    - I had fun.

- I leave for Florida in less than 24 hours, and in less than 48 hours I will be on a cruise boat.
   - Sunday can't come soon enough, all I want to do is sleep until Amber picks me up tomorrow afternoon.
   - I bought a couple new dresses, and they are really pretty.
   - I need to remember my sun glasses.
   - While on the cruise, we are going on a Pub Tour in Key West, and we are going Snorkeling in Cozumel, and hopefully Cave tubing in Belize.
   - I am beyond excited.

- I have come to the conclusion that I am happier now than I have been in a long while.
- I blame Joe.
-I can crochet. I'm working on a hat. It's not a very good hat, but it's better than any hat I've never made before.
- I bowled a 102 on Thursday! I don't know the last time I broke 100.

- My car is finally inspected.
- over the past 3 months, I've spent about $1000 to fix my car, and get it back to working order.
- I sent in the registration today, so It should be registered by the time I get home.
- Piper also has a disgusting scent in it that I can't seem to get rid of. At first, it smelled like a whopper, that lasted 3 days.
- I febreezed the entire interior and then it smelled like a whopper drenched in cotton linen febreeze.
- After I picked it up from the shop, it smelled like Whopper, Febreeze and grease from mechanics, so I sprayed limeaway.
- Now, it has the most putrid, almost metallic scent. I can almost taste it when I drive.
- It is fucking sick.

- Joe is not sure what he wants to do anymore. I don't think he wants to move here.
-If he wanted to go to Buffalo, I am pretty sure that I would go with him.
-Even though I wouldn't know anyone in Buffalo, and I'd have to change jobs, and we'd have to get a more expensive apartment.
-This makes me unbelievably nervous and stressed out.

- I am working on my photography.
- I need to work on not being lazy, and try taking pictures when I see pictures that could be taken.
- I am also reading about photography, which is really kinda helpful, but doesn't help with the laziness.


- I am going out tonight, but I have to drive myself, so I can't drink.

I think that covers mostly everything.

amor_ausente @ 2009-10-18T17:40:00

2009-10-18T21:59:02Z

I have been thinking about death a LOT lately. Not in an "I want to die" type way, more of in an existential way. I want to know what would happen once I die. I want to know how people would react, what my family would do. What would my funeral be like? When I'm driving, I imagine driving my car off the road, or into on coming traffic... and I come up with the scenarios that could happen, how long it would take for people to get to the accident, if a passerby would stop and see how I'm doing. If i would sit there in the car or on the ground for a while after. It freaks me out... I feel like watching those crime shows really messes up my perspective on life and death, as does the fact that a murder has happened in the place that I work. I watch all sorts of murder shows, and last night I was watching a movie about Ted Bundy, which was messed up. I don't know. I wonder what it would be like to die. I don't believe in heaven, or hell, or purgatory or whatever. I really hope that when I die, I can wander around the world, or just wander. I think it would be cool to be a ghost.
Am I crazy? Sometimes I feel crazy.

I'm watching the Bills game with Danny.
*I'm watching the Jets game with Danny. . . The Bills are useless.

I like Sundays a lot.

Cruise in 8 days! This time next week, I'm pretty sure I will be on a plane for Florida. . . I am so psyched.

yesterday was the worst.

2009-10-11T21:49:50Z

Work was just as terrible as I thought it was going to be.
I had to call 8 people and tell them that we had to move their reservations to a different hotel.
As you can imagine, this does not go well, ever. No one is ever like "OH AWESOME! I TOTALLY WANTED TO STAY AT A DIFFERENT HOTEL!" No. it more or less goes "I'm not moving, this is ridiculous, I made these reservations last month, I want to talk to your manager"
But alas, there are no managers on duty on weekends at the hotel that I work at. I think I'm going to try to talk to Todd or Natalie about that. Because I don't think it's professional to have your front desk staff walk guests without a manager being present to talk to the guest.
Also, the reservations we had to move to Motel 6 (shittier hotel) should have been taken care of on Friday, before either of the managers left. I should not be calling guests the day of arrival telling them that we don't have a room for them, but that we have to move them 20 minutes away to a lower rated hotel. I just feel that having a manager present on weekends would be beneficial during times that the hotel is sold out. There is one rant.

Secondly, I am sick of living at home. I'm sure it will be better when I have my own space, and a wall preventing my sister from stealing my clothes on a regular basis, and never giving them back. I don't have nice clothes. I have clothes that a teenager might wear, but she takes my nice clothes, without asking, and wears them and keeps them for weeks. And Since I have to wear my work clothes 5 days out of 7, I don't notice that my clothes are missin until I have plans to go out and do something. I asked her yesterday if I could borrow one of her shirts because I didn't have any clothes. She basically said fuck you, no you can't. That's when my parents told me that she steals my stuff when I'm not home... awesome, you bitch. I'm sure things would be fine if i didn't have to see her every day. Also, on a less important note my dad really pissed me off because when i came home the other night from work I said Hi to him and all he said to me was "go to bed" am i 6 years old again? fuck that. I will stay up as long as I fucking want. So that pissed me off really badly because work sucked, I was starving, and I wanted to sit and watch TV for a little while. Instead I went to my room and just hung out on line for a while. My room is a disaster area, I need to clean it up tomorrow after work, after I take Joe home.

Anyway, after work I went to get my hair fixed, and it's lighter all over now. It looks ok I suppose. I kinda want to get highlights or something, but my hair needs time to repair itself. I went to Lux last night because I wanted to get wasted (and I totally did). Joe and his friends came, which was really cool. I got drunker than I really should have. I love Joe... really really.

fuckity.

2009-10-10T10:30:24Z

I am not happy, and that means that this is the worst time to update my livejournal.
It is also 6:24am and I'm supposed to leave for work in 6 min... but I'm sitting here in my bathrobe with my wet hair still up in a towel.
All I want to do is crawl back into my bed and sleep, but instead I have to go to work and call 10 people to tell them that we can't honor their reservation at the hotel they booked it at, but that I would happily switch them to our location in Greece. I hate talking on the phone, and I hate confrontation. I have to do both of those things today.
After work I think I will go get my hair fixed so I don't look like a two tone loser anymore.
I suppose I will go get ready for work now.
Because I can't/won't/don't want to write any more right now.

:-/
fuckity fuck.
hjkafub

I was going to write something.

2009-10-02T01:43:56Z

But I can not remember what it was.
So I'm not going to write anything.
except that.

John Muir was awesome.

2009-09-28T01:30:34Z

FACT.
This guy walked across the US... he would speak with the wildlife, and the flowers and rocks. He once sat in a tree to see how it felt to be a tree in a storm. He climbed behind the tallest waterfall without any climbing tools or restraints to see how the water felt coming over the water fall. and he wrote about the life of a raindrop. This was in the late 1800s. Amazing.

I have that itch again... the one I get when I feel I have to go somewhere... I feel like I'll never get to see anything if I don't do it now. I should have gone on that bicycle trip. I want to bathe in natural hot springs, and under waterfalls. and I want to see trees that have been around for hundreds of years. And mountains, and rivers, and canyons, and forests, and ugh. I should not be allowed to watch Expedition shows on WXXI. . . :[

And...I don't want to go without Joe.
Maybe if we save, we can go next summer?
I hope so.

They just told us about a guy named Truman Everts, who was on an expedition of Yellowstone Park.
He got separated from the group, his horse ran away with all his supplies, he had a pair of opera glasses which he started fires with, but he would carry around a burning stick, because he could only make fire in sunlight. He also lost the supplies he DID have when he rolled into his fire while he was sleeping. Then he had to stay in a tree to escape a mountain lion, and he got burned by a hot spring, and broke through a sheath of rock and was burned by steam as well. this guy was lost for 37 days. He lived on Thistle root, and when they found him, he weighed 50lbs! and he lived to be 85... AND he married a 14 year old girl when he was in his mid sixties.

Anyway... I'm not sure why I had to write about all these people.

I tried to dye my hair blondish on Tuesday. . . It didn't work out so well because my apparently my hair holds on to the old color, and it only colored the top 1/3 of my head. . . it was not blond, it was red, *it IS red.
So I was going to have it fixed on Friday, but the lady told me to wait a couple
weeks before doing anything else... because I told her i didn't want to dye it back darker. So I am kinda stuck with a two toned head.
My car goes in to the garage on Tuesday, to get the timing belt, and the water pump fixeddd.
I am not excited about that.
I am excited about it being inspected tho. . . And I will be getting that done on the 9th.
Cruise on the 25th of October. (Actually we ship out on the 26th, but we're leaving the 25th)
Joe moves in... sometime... I am not actually sure when.
I can't wait :D
Oh... I also put my electric blanket on my bed last night. I was warm for the entire night. it was fantastic.
I am going to go to bed now, work at 645 tomorrow morning.
Yay livejournal cuts.

amor_ausente @ 2009-09-22T18:43:00

2009-09-22T22:48:08Z

Danny is home. He is currently playing his drums in the basement.
I guess I didn't realize that I'd actually missed hearing him play.
He is around more now that he's moved out of the house, which seems weird to me.
But I can't say that I mind. :]

Tala caught a squirrel... she brought it right up to the front door and dropped it there.
It's disgusting, but I haven't ever seen her so happy, haha.

My parents cleaned out all the kitchen cabinets in the apartment!
Joe is quitting his job in a month... :D
And then he's moving here! :DD

I want to re arrange/clean my room. Maybe I will do that tonight/ tomorrow afternoon.

Or the police report would have mentioned it.

2009-09-19T10:48:06Z

I love this.

friends only.

2009-09-16T00:34:04Z

My previous entry is a friends only entry. Cause it has stuff in it that I do not want the general public (or employers) reading about me.
So if you want to read it, you'll have to be my friend... sorrry.

Update.

2009-09-15T02:13:42Z

I haven't actually said what I have been up to the past couple weeks.

umm last week I had 5 days off in a row.
I spent 4 of those days at Joe's house. I stayed at his house while he went to work, then we would go get food..or make food, or something.
Wednesday Emily and I went to Darien lake with the 2 tickets I had gotten from work, it was fun. I forgot how nice it is to hang out with Emily, because we get along pretty well when it's just her and I.
Wednesday night I went to Joe's house and stayed there until Sunday.
We went to the bar one night, then we went to cold stone creamery which is 24 hours because it's in Tim Hortons.
He got Cheesecake I think? I got chocolate. I liked his better.
We drank a bunch of his mom's liquor Thursday night I think, and watched a movie. I have no idea what movie.
Saturday... I don't even remember what we did. OH! we went to Wingfest in Buffalo, where I ate chicken wings and did not feel good afterwards. But it was fun... expensive, but fun :]

Sunday we went to his friend Sam's house and they went off road biking, and I went for like 10 min, then went back to hang out with Sam's wife because i felt like dying. So she and I watched I love Lucy and made dinner.
then we played a game called Kan Jam which involves a frisbee and a couple baskets, which is pretty fun.
and then I came home so I could work on Monday.

And I have been working ever since.
My mom and Emily and I started the south beach diet again.
my goal is to be down to at least 120 by the 25th of October.
Because thats when I leave for my cruise. which is also awesome and exciting.

I am going now, to finish up my work, because I am working right now and thats what I must do.
But I also got my hair cut today... so I will have pics of that pretty soon. I like it. :D

fuck.

2009-09-13T03:05:25Z

I hate how my birth control fails to manage my PMS.

The likely hood of me crying myself to sleep is ridiculously high.
Would you like to know why I will probably cry myself to sleep?
Well so would I... because right now, it just seems like my mind is on a one way train to self destruct in any way possible.
It could be anything... it could be the fact that I didn't get to eat my corn on the cob tonight, or that I have to go to work tomorrow morning.
It might be that my pillow is too warm, my feet are too cold, and I am not getting enough attention from ANYONE in my life.
All of which are probably false. But I will cry about it anyway.
Because my body HATES MY FUCKING GUTS.
Oh hello self loathing! malicious doubt of anyone's faithfulness to me!
My old friends, it is good to know that you would never abandon me in my moment of temporary insanity.

Commence self hating, "no-one-could-ever-love-you, you're a fat, ugly piece of shit" mindset.

Being a girl fucking sucks.
But I'll tell you this much. . . if you fucking cross me tomorrow, I will probably cut out your heart and eat it with a little BBQ sauce.
Maybe I should just stay home. . . but this could be fun.

I'm sure by tomorrow I'll be a cheerful, radiant, exuberant ray of sunshine wishing everyone a wonderful day.
But for now, eat shit and die.

Why i have a tiny, insignificant crush on Joey Comeau

2009-09-09T03:43:42Z

untoward.livejournal.com/430915.html

I have no idea why that is such a good example, but it is.
It makes me want to bake him cupcakes... or something?


I have updates! But I'm so busy doing important things tonight that I have no time to update them.

Oh the sadness....
I miss Joe... :[

this morning my computer monitor turned on by itself. This happened at 5:22 in the morning. I yelled "ghosts! let me sleep for 20 minutes!" and then I woke up and got freaked out. But I was remarkably on time for work today, I was impressed.

Laundry's done!
bye!

I love you!

2009-09-07T22:08:04Z

You can read this in your lame voice if you want.